Saturday
gotten back from church not long ago.. went for practice as the teens will be presenting 2 songs tomolo due to youth month.. ya.. so now my left fingers are all kinda sore.. too long din practice my guitar..
on the way home.. something came over me.. a thought..
God gave his onli Son for us,. Jesus.. and He died on the cross for our sins.. He was a total stranger too many.. but He willingly gave up His life for EVERYONE..
how can someone.. give up everything just for the forgiveness of sins?.
its lyk.. how come a person can so willingly sacrifice so much.. his time.. his money.. his love and the care that he have and gave it to someone who he appreciates/love?.
i have been tinkin too much lately.. mayb due to love.. feelings that i have for this someone.. joanne.. thats who she is..
takin things slow.. tryin to knw her betta and not rush anything at all.. but i just cant help myself but keep tinking.. what if this.. and what if that..
there are always many things to go through before you get the love you want..
stress is always imparted on ourself by ourself..
mayb i am just scared.. scared of losin her as she is so dear too me?. do i have the confidence that i need to carry on.. pursuing wad i want.. wantin her to be in my life..
why all the sudden love.. why so much feelings goin thru my heart..
God.. guide me..
1. get to knw her betta..
2. wait when the time is right..
3. see the guidance of GOD..
4. dun stress/add pressure to her..
5. be there when she needs me..
6. do not be over sensitive/obessive..
jonathan.. you need to cool down and dont tink so so much!!
Placed By Jonathan
7/17/2004 11:31:00 PM
yesterday after school.. some of us went to jansen's mum's shop to take a look at specs cuz deng hui wanna make a new one.. and i also wanna make one to wear for fun.. just for a different look.. haha,. we chose the frames that we want but we din know that the frame would cost so expensive..
the total cost of the specs for me would be abt $110.. i was lyk.. so expensive.. hehe,. den his mum advise us to come back on monday to take a look at some plastic frames.. as the design is also quite nice..
therefore we decided to go back again.. after that we went off to suntec to have dinner which was abt 7plus.. and we actually wanted to watch the movie -
King Arthur.. but they din want too..
so we walked around and hang around.. i got the chance to sit down and talk to joanne abt us?. lyk we talked abt being there for her and waiting and giving her the support when she needs it.. and ya.. she realise that.. so its a good thing..
she just told me to give her time as she needs to settle things with the other side.. and that would be ya..
the other side..
and i am goin so much deeper into this.. startin to cherish a person so so much.. and the feeling is totally different.. its lyk.. *hmm*
dunno how to explain..
so now i just have to wait patiently and just try not to rush things.. cuz she kinda have to cope with her studies.. CCA's.. her friends.. and herself.. she's such a busy person and i dun reallie wanna stress her or add any pressure..
she said.. take things easy and go with the flow.. ya.. and i totally hope thats a good plan.. its lyk i dun want things to go wrong?. lyk no time for anyone and we kinda stray from eachother.. *sighz*
okay2.. dun tink too much..
take things easy..
Placed By Jonathan
7/17/2004 11:50:00 AM
Thursday
so many questions in my head.. why do people have to tink so much?. where i am reallie heading too?. what am i supposed to do with what i am now..
thoughts in my head that i cant figure them out.. am i stress?. thats why i am getting so many thoughts?. *hmm*
why do people give so much of their time.. give so much just to get something that they want.. when they feel that they have sort of achieve their goal.. they feel so delighted.. or on cloud nine?. lyk very thing seems so fine.. goin so well..
but when it starts to slip away.. we started to realise.. we din reallie achieve anything at all.. and we feel so so down.. as though a sudden change of mood.. so unpredictable.. at times..
i am so uncertain of my feelings at times.. am i figuring who i want to be?. or what is reallie behind the story?.
the day as school was pasting quite fast.. in the morning.. din wanna go to sch.. juz wanna rest on my bed.. am feeling so tired.. so tired.. its lyk i no longer have the energy to carry on.. still i had to go to sch..
*duh*
got to meet joanne during my lunch.. kinda happy to see her.. getting to knw her betta.. day by day.. as things reveal and i discover them.. she would be havin her dragonboat training now.. such a sporty person.. and talkin abt training.. totally cant wait for mine to start..
now at home.. hot.. sweaty.. hungry..
so many things to do.. do some HTML work.. practice on my programming.. so i will knw what to do.. get use to it.. cuz i wanna score well.. had FS quiz today.. sort of a test..
today in CSA class.. i was totally lost in the lecture and tutorial.. dun understand what Mdm Connie is talking abt.. so it seems i need to open my textbk and read thru and understand..
my cough still aint recovering.. still coughin as usual.. *argh* aint taking care of myself.. i need a personal nurse.. to take care of me - 24/7..
am feeling
confused..
Placed By Jonathan
7/15/2004 07:28:00 PM
having lecture now.. CSA..
boring boring..
half hour more and sch's ending.. to mambo later.. play pool and *sighz* have to wait till 5pm for the ICT briefing.. wonder what will they gonna touch on.. heard from some of my friends that there will be some interview thing.. hope i can get thru..
need some CCA points when i am in poly.. have to be get good grades.. so i can go into UNI and get the course that i want too.. that would be MASS COMM.. becoming a DJ and all.. thats lyk mine ambition..
*sighz*
now trying to give what i can to this girl that i want.. sacrifice.. lyk spiderman 2.. sacrifice.. but i guess by doin that.. you kinda move ahead up to get this girl..
things people do to get what they want..
Mdm Connie.. your lecture is totally boring.. i totally dun understand.. *sighz*
have to get my friends to teach me CSA.. its good to have friends who are your senior.. so that they can teach you.. if i ever become a teacher.. and totally will teach secondary school kids.. nv in poly.. even though the salary is good.. but still consider first..
enough crap.. trying to kill time..
Placed By Jonathan
7/15/2004 02:26:00 PM
having lecture now.. CSA..
boring boring..
half hour more and sch's ending.. to mambo later.. play pool and *sighz* have to wait till 5pm for the ICT briefing.. wonder what will they gonna touch on.. heard from some of my friends that there will be some interview thing.. hope i can get thru..
need some CCA points when i am in poly.. have to be get good grades.. so i can go into UNI and get the course that i want too.. that would be MASS COMM.. becoming a DJ and all.. thats lyk mine ambition..
*sighz*
now trying to give what i can to this girl that i want.. sacrifice.. lyk spiderman 2.. sacrifice.. but i guess by doin that.. you kinda move ahead up to get this girl..
things people do to get what they want..
Mdm Connie.. your lecture is totally boring.. i totally dun understand.. *sighz*
have to get my friends to teach me CSA.. its good to have friends who are your senior.. so that they can teach you.. if i ever become a teacher.. and totally will teach secondary school kids.. nv in poly.. even though the salary is good.. but still consider first..
enough crap.. trying to kill time..
Placed By Jonathan
7/15/2004 02:26:00 PM
Tuesday
it have been raining so often.. *sighz* totally not good?. i got this module call S&W - Sports and Wellness.. so called PE to many.. we have to select a sport out of 5.. so i picked basketball.. cuz its one of my interest/passion.. but the lecture in charge is a strict person.. attendance will be marked at 3pm sharped.. anyone late will be considered absent..
and when it rains during his lesson.. he need to do stupid stuffs.. lyk fitness and conditioning.. running up and down the stairs.. push up.. stretchings.. things that i totally drag..
okay2.. lets talk abt some of my core modules.. few modules lyk CSA which is lyk computer applications and stuffs.. another is lyk FS which is maths that i am so poor in.. *sighz* and the worst of all.. PSP1 which is programming!! *argh*
first week of real lessons/lectures/practicals/tutorials..*sighz* the pace is quite fast and progressive.. and we need to discover many things on our own.. at times.. i feel lost.. lost in the fast track of human life.. people moving and rushing around lyk bullet trains..
cant they just sit down and stop for a moment?.
i feel so motivated.. to workout.. do training.. as in pump iron.. but i have to wait for my dad to be fully recovered so then he can bring me to the gym.. he's my coach.. haha,.
hope when he comes back.. he wun say he is tired.. otherwise.. we will not go to the gym very soon?. *sighz* lyk at a point.. we visit the gym quite often till his work got busy and he comes back home quite late.. so no one will actually bring me there.. so i naturally will be lazy to go there on my own..
pls pls..
hope this wun happen at all..
go baywatch body..
here i come!!
Placed By Jonathan
7/13/2004 07:32:00 PM
Monday
it was sunday yesterday.. went to church.. and it was great?. felt refresh i would say.. haha,. had lunch with dad.. mum.. granny.. auntie.. second auntie.. uncle andrew and his mum.. haha,. lunch was on second auntie.. so we had chicken rice.. not any normal kind.. its lyk they order 2 different types of chicken.. bean sprout.. oil vegetables.. raw fish.. cuttlefish.. fruits.. yummy ya.. haha,.
okay..
whatever..
i headed back to church for teens programme.. bible study.. and after all of that.. we had practice cuz the teens need to present 2 song items.. ya.. so i played the guitar.. and my left fingers were all red.. cuz have to grip hard onto the strings.. haha,. so ya.. not used to the guitar in church.. the one i had at home i so much betta.. enough of my nonsense.. haha,.
went to suntec with lian kai to have dinner at cafe cartel.. with uncle andrew.. and know wad.. it was his treat.. *shh* haha,.
i order the pork ribs with BBQ sauce.. *hmm* so so.. din reallie lyk it.. haha,. ya.. and we headed to pacific coffee to have coffee.. but as usual.. root beer topped my list.. haha,.
went back home soon after..
today sch was cool.. first time attended lecture.. so was not quite used to it?. and i also have FS homework.. fundamental statistics.. which is lyk MATHS.. totally hating.. but wad to do.. have to pass this module.. otherwise.. *sighz*
went to beauty world to play pool with some of my classmates just now.. haha,. been since quite some time since i played pool.. a nice gathering with those guys.. haha,.
now in sch doin FS.. *sighz*
Placed By Jonathan
7/12/2004 04:59:00 PM
